Inappropriate Nautical References

A few nights ago, I was having a conversation with my Brother and Sister, and the topic of Pirates of the Caribbean star Keira Knightley being really hot came up...

Somehow, this resulted in a contest to see who could come up with the best Pirate-Themed phrase that essentially translated into "I want to bang Keira Knightley"

Here are some of the ones I remember.

She could Walk my Plank / I'd like to Walk her Plank
She could climb my Crow's Nest
She could Hoist my Sails
I'd like to Shiver her Timbers
I'd like to Plunder her Booty
I'd like to Keelhaul her
I'd like to Swab her Poop Deck
I'd like to show her my Peg Leg
I'd like to visit her Briny Deep
I'd like to get in her Davy Jones' Locker

As you can see, they just got dumber and dumber...just like most conversations...